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Absent children

And so the holidays continue, and so my children are ever more absent. Abi has obviously been at Angie's for what seems like forever, and even Izzy has been in and out and then this weekend took a leaf out of her sister's books and disappeared as well - I'm getting a good sense of what it will be like in a few years and I don't think I'm ready!

So despite my complaining, Abi did make it home (briefly) this weekend, with lots of stories of her 10 days away to regale / fill me with horror in equal measures. We've hardly heard from her while she has been away, mainly as she has been with Grace and when the two of them are together they clearly need no-one else. Both Angie and Russell were at pains to say to me just how proud I should be of her though - apparently the two of them have worked tirelessly and without complaint. They have been up first thing, getting on with he jobs they needed to do, anticipating additional work needed and getting it done before without ever having to be asked. Is this really my child I ask myself, the same one who has to be told 20 times just to pick her towel up off the bathroom floor?!?

As a reward for so much hard work they went to the festival where they got to see a bunch of bands I would have liked to see - typical! I'd like to think they went in smelly jodhpurs but again, no. Grace sis their make up and off they went, Abi dressed in Grace's clothes it seems. Grace is 15 - eek! There is a filter on this photo but even so Abi looks way older than she is sometimes - I'm off to put my head in the sand somewhere! Luckily I think horses are still far more interesting than anything else for both of them and long may that continue.

Abi came home in a smelly, slightly grumpy heap and we had to do the inevitable transition from 2 weeks of significant freedom (she's been living in the caravan with Grace) to being back under house rules. We managed to find some common ground in the end and the 3 of us (me, Abi and Izzy) settled down on the sofa together to watch a bit of TV and chat - some equilibrium finally. This then erupted when I said we were going to Sharron's birthday party the following day, Abi said she wasn't going and wanted to go to Mia's and everything got shouty again. I remlented in the end and said "fine, go to Mia's", checked whether that was a possibility with Mia's Mum, only for Abi to then shout at me for trying to run her life for her - I can't win!!! In the end we all went to the party (cue shouting from Glenn because of the traffic) - happy families (ha ha ha).

Having got to the party at 2:30pm, by 4pm Glenn was itching to leave (it's a 200 mile round trip - I was hoping to stay just a bit longer!). Cut a long story short I managed to drag it out until about 4:30pm, at which point Izzy decided to stay and come back with Jon and Lucy (Lucy being allowed to stay until 5pm by Jon who is almost as bad as Glenn). Half way home and we get a call to say "Can I stay with Simon and Sharron, Simon will bring me back on Monday" so that's what she did - only Izzy would end up having a sleep over with the birthday girl at a 50th birthday party!

It mattered not a jot that she had no PJs / underwear / washbag - all of this can be overcome and so it was, with a shopping trip today followed by the biggest ice creams Ive seen for a while and a long bubble bath - Izzy is in her element! She may come home, but reluctantly I think.

So Abi then disappeared to Mia's after the party and we got her back at lunchtime, just in time for me to feel we'd re-connected as I drove her back to Angie's for another week. I'm sure it gets easier, and already it was easier as we had the time together in the car which was great, she was chatty and happy and the lovely smiley version of my daughter that I'm desperate to hold onto. Grace isn't there this week either which means Ive had 2 phone calls this evening - more than I had I think in the whoe 10 days she was there previously.

I know they are growing up, I know I should pride myself on the independent girls I've brought up who others are more than happy to have with them, but I will admit to the fact that I'm finding the transition hard. I love the additional freedom it gives me and us as a couple, but I miss them needing to be close to me. I should console myself with Abi's words "I do need you Mummy, just not as much" - never a truer word spoken!


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